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Sept. 4th. Group Email. Subject: 100 day check up. Met with my doc today to review my latest scans. Looks like I'm still in solid remission. It was almost exactly a year ago that I was getting bad news after bad news, today was nice for a change. Actually, ever since the Bone Marrow Transplant things have been going pretty well. To celebrate I went for a short run with Kuma (paw's healed), pumped some iron with new found strength, ate a huge plate of fresh pasta with mounds of garden tomatoes, and finally registered for school. I celebrated by having what I missed most of all, all last year: a normal day. Still trying to figure out what the last year has done to my life. If anything, I've decided to build real relaxation into my schedule. Relaxation: something I used to view as optional now seems essential. My goal is yoga twice a week and getting a professional massage twice a month, as well as the usual biking, hiking, and eventually skiing. You got to have goals. Suppose what I'm really after is to avoid unnecessary stress. It really isn't worth it. Ask me, I know. So, more good news from the salty city. See ya in the mountains..
Quote of the Month "Things
are more like they are now than they ever were before."
September 28th. Passing Thoughts. So, I guess this is how long it takes for your life to return to normal after a year of heinous tumors and the subsequent chemo bombardment. Not bad...... in retrospect. As I look back at this website I am completely amazed at how much I've forgotten already, how much I'm already taking for granted, how much of the old routine I've returned to. I feel like a better person than I was before, but then there I go loosing my temper, or becoming impatience like I never have before. (Do these emotions just feel more intense now that I'm more aware of them?) Sometimes I secretly call myself the time bomb man because it seems as though the scar tissue in my chest is just waiting for me to do something unhealth to explode back into cancerous growth. There are even times that I'm feeling rushed or unfocused in my daily activities then suddenly I feel a twinge of electricity flash from the old tumor site, as if to remind me "hey, mellow out, man. Just enjoy life." Some people have little devils or angels dropping hints in their ears, I just feel the clock ticking. I've been designing up a storm. I don't really like being busy anymore, but being a designer will do it to you. It's like needing a permanent "do not disturb" sign stapled to your forehead and a "please pry me away from this computer" sign on your back.... Still trying to find balance. Still trying to make each moment count. Still trying to be a little selfish about my needs, like needing to go back to the canyons of Southern Utah this weekend... |
