The Top 10 Things I Won't Miss About Chemotherapy

 

1) The "Uncle Fester" look.

2) Having sore veins; running out of good places to stick needles.

3) Bumping into an old friend, but they don't recgonize me without hair or eyebrows.

4) Wondering what I'm supposed to think after being informed about side effects such as "may cause aseptic necrosis or luekemia" or "may cause feelings of tingling, burning, weakness, numbness, clumsiness, shaking, trembling, etc."

5) Mouth sores that take forever to heal.

6) The fact that "chemo" still isn't recgonized by my spell checker (no one to blame but myself).

7) The lovely metallicy sauerkrauty taste that everything got a couple days after my chemotherapy "cocktails."

8) Trying to maintain casual conversation with the nurse as she pushes caustic fluids into my veins.

9) Completely forgetting that I was visited by friends because of theAttivan stupor effect.

10) Hearing from the Dr. "well, your insurance company is unlikely to cover that."

11) "Suprise" dry-heave nausia attacks.

12) Being so bored that I actually read forwarded emails.


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