May 2nd. Email Message.
Slouching at the computer
again, bought two used cd's today. I'm stocking up for my hospital
stay. Needs tunes to listen to whilst I pedal, soaring motionlessly
over the linolium. Gallium scan tomorrow, more computed tomographies
of my chest and abdomen rotating on screen with lit up blotches
that hopefully aren't there or lit up at all. Feeling good,
ready to go, spinal tap me, chemical cook me turn me over I'm
done and ready to get on with my life. Work? pull my own damn
weight for a change? Get out of this house on 561 East 600 South
and see the world. Travel without a mask. Why do airplanes recycle
air anyway? Why can't they just suck in fresh air from outside?
My torn and beaten Honda has a switch that goes from fresh to
recycle, why can't an airplane have one, make the switch freshen
up. Not like I really want to leave Chemoville. It's such a
fun place. Where every time you sit down your legs thank you
for getting off them cuz they're damn tired of standing so get
off sit down I'm tired. Thank you. Ahhhhhh.
Me getting ready for a really bad head ache.
May 6th. Group Email. Subject:Survivor
that's me. I survived Friday
An eight hour ordeal at LDS Hospital involving a CT Scan, blood
tests, physical, lumbar puncture, neupogen shot, a gallium scan
and other unmentionables. Everything went as smoothly as possible.
The spinal tap wasn't so bad, though I wouldn't recommend one
for the fun of it. Hopefully my spinal fluid will test out to
be free of cancer, otherwise, I'll get 5 more spinal taps in
which chemo will be directly infused beyond the blood brain
After finally escaping the
hospital, chris and I had a little picnic in the park where
I've never felt so glad to be outside and away from needles.
Then we went home where while propping open one of our old wood
frame windows the pane slipped and slammed down on my middle
finger. After cursing and doing the "owie" dance for a while,
I promptly realized that slamming the window on myself was probably
the most painful procedure of the day, as well as the proverbial
icing on the cake.
The spinal tap fun continued
on Saturday morning when I found myself with a raging headache
that fluctuated from outrageous to incredible and then back
again. Instead of calling an on-call doc like I'm supposed to,
I went stalking down help until I found it at LDS hospital.
After some pain meds, a blood transfusion, and a really wacky
nurse I was feeling back to a relative normal.
If my blood recovers from
the last chemo on time, I'll be starting my new high dose chemo
journey on Wednesday. I'll be bringing my laptop and and logging
on from time to time. I'll be sending out hospital details as
soon as I know.
For those who have ever wondered
what a lumbar puncture looks like I have included a couple explicative
picts of myself. Enjoy!
Maple syrup, anyone?
May 13th. Group Email.
Subject: Hospital Bound
Well, I'm going in to the
hospital on Tuesday morning. Here's a quick list to get everyone
up to speed on what's happening in chemoville:
Remember that list of all
the things I was going to do? Well, I didn't do anything as
this last week has been spent recovering from the spinal tap
(horrible headaches that wouldn't go away) and a bad cold. Running
around would have been nice, but I settled for laying around
and watching a ton of movies.
I saw the Dali Lama and listened
to his teachings last Friday night. I feel lucky to have experienced
his positivism and compassion, and I will take his inspiring
living example into the hospital with me.
My spinal tap came back clean
so I shouldn't have to go through that again for a long while.
Results of my last gallium
scan came back good too. My tumor has shrunk about as much as
everyone hoped. The Hospital stay is still essential to reduce
my odds of recurrence.
To reach me after Tuesday,
call me at LDS hospital at 408-1415. I'm going to be on the
eighth floor, oncology ward (8th Ave and C street). Of course
you can keep the emails coming. Include stories, jokes and/or
poetry when possible. Thanks ahead of time.
Visiting time is anytime,
any day (Within reason of course). Call first if you want to
see what kind of shape I'm in. If I completely forget that you
ever visited me it's because of the Ativan (no, really) and
I apologize ahead of time.
They'll ask you to wash your
hands and to not visit if you're sick. A sick visitor would
really make me nervous and would have to suffer the wrath of
my mom and nurses.
If you're in the area, I hope
you'll visit me. I'm wagering that guests will be my salvation
from boredom and frustration. If not, there's always staring
out the window, the exercise bike, books on tape, drawing, or
putting into practice those teaching of the Dali Lama.
Thanks a bunch and hopefully
I'll be talking at you from my Avenues office soon.
Gallium scan from 5,4. Still some uptake in the media stinal